This was very thought provoking. I too am getting out of an abusive relationship only mine was more psychological abuse than it was physical.

I am coming to realize more and more that it was his problem and that I didn't have to feed into it by agreeing that I was the problem, the only problem. (my problem was that I wouldn't or couldn't stand up for myself. I didn't think I was good enough.)

His mother, too, has guilty conscience when it comes to him. She and his father divorced when he was little and she has been trying to compensate for it ever since. She has been getting him out of jams all his life and he's now almost 61!

The question that comes up is why do we love men like this?